Open Your Eyes

"Baby come back, any kind of fool could see

There was something in everything about you

Baby come back, you can blame it all on me

I was wrong, and I just can't live without you"

Guess what the name of the band who sang that song was??

Go ahead, guess!

The name of the band was "Player”.

Yeah.  Player.  I meeeeeaaaannn…

If I had a nickel for every guy who came crawling back to me a day late and a dollar short…well, let’s just say, I’d have a pocket full of nickels.

What the hell is it with dudes these days?  Seriously!

I had a guy dump me two years ago via text and I saw him in the street later that same day and he saw me and drove away as I waved at him to come talk to me.  Ummmm…really?  It’s not like I was walking down the street with a freakin’ pickax…what did he think I was going to do to him?...Yell him to death?

This same jackass had the nerve to tell me six months later that if I would give him another chance he would cherish every hair on my head forever and ever…or some bullshit. 

Fool musta done gone and lost his mind!

And this went on for like 3 months before I finally just blocked his number and his email so that I wouldn’t have to read his sorry ass messages anymore.  For all I know, he’s been emailing me to this day…oh, and he tried to friend me on Facebook a few weeks ago. 

Um…no.


Two nights ago I had a guy tell me in all sincerity "I love you".   And he meant it in the "I don't want to just be friends" way.


I hadn't seen or heard from him in several years.


Um, what?

Is it too much to ask that a guy stop being so f$%#ing blinded by fear that he can see you clearly the FIRST time around?!  Cause listen up fellas…once we are done with you…we are DONE WITH YOU! 

Unless we aren’t done with you. 

Cause that happened to me a couple of times too.  A guy dumps me in the most horrible way imaginable (meaning, not in person and not with any sort of compassion attached) and then a year or five later they come back and I let them try to make it up to me.

They never do.  It’s always an EXACT replica of the first time they treated you like shit.

I was sort of under the impression that if you wanted to win someone back, that you were supposed to CHANGE your crappy behavior into less crappy behavior.  Wrong.

I can’t blame men completely.  Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.

But I do find it funny that no matter who they were, how involved the relationship was, how horrifying the ending was, what ridiculous things you said to one another…they always come back.  Each and every single last one of them.

I’d really like to stop adding men to this list.  I feel that Mr. 8th Grade Moment from my last blog is Jonesing to get on this list.  I don't think I can do anything to stop him.  


What men are so afraid of I will never know.  Last time I checked, love was pretty awesome, but I dunno...it was kind of a long time ago, maybe I'm remembering it wrong.

Is there anyone out there who doesn’t need to lose me first in order to appreciate my awesomeness?

Anyone?

Anyone?

Bueller?...