What Did You Expect?

I just had a conversation with a friend of mine, let's call her "Annette", and she just said to me that she would commit to the man that she is with right now because he is 85% of what she is looking for.

Eighty-five percent. Is that all there is?

There is a best-selling book that has been around for ages titled "What To Expect When You Are Expecting" and it's for pregnant mother's-to-be. Well, where is the guide for "What To Expect From Your Life Partner"?

Does every single person in life settle when it comes to getting married? Is the world full of couples who are with their 85% match as opposed to 100%? Is 100% possible? What would that look like?

In the movie "Singles", Bridgette Fonda is explaining to her surgeon that she's narrowed her search for the right man down to just one thing "Some who says "Gezundheit" when I sneeze...but I prefer "Bless You"...it's nicer".

Is this what we've been reduced to? You can pick one thing. Just one. And if a man has that one thing, then, he's the guy for you. Forget "Tall Dark and Handsome". That was thrown out years ago. Your new choices are as follows: a) Tall, b) Dark, c) Handsome.

You are more than welcome to a man who is short and ugly, but "Dark".

or

You are more than welcome to a man who is dark and tall, but not "Handsome".

or

You are more than welcome to a man who is ugly and pale, but very, very "Tall".

But, sorry ladies, you can't have all three.

All I hear nowadays is how men like women who are "easy" to be with. Not necessarily easy to get into the sack mind you, but easy going...i.e., doormats.

Forget when all you had to do was be pretty. That's not enough anymore, nor does it seem to even be required. Most of the women that I attended high school with (the married ones) are all FAT now. Let's not blame it on baby weight either shall we? Cause that's not it. Look at Heidi Klum. She's had tons of babies and usually does a catwalk two weeks after the birth of each one. (I wouldn't expect this of a mere mortal, but if your baby is in grade school and you are still blaming that extra 20lbs on him/her...you're fooling yourself).

Nor does it seem that you need to have smarts...this actually seems to be a detriment to any single woman these days. The smarter you are, the longer you will most likely be single. If you are smart your propensity for being "easy going" (a doormat) is likely to be very very unlikely indeed. So, if you have beauty AND brains. You're fucked.

Most of the single women that I know, including myself, have been just as open to lowering our standards like poor Ms. Fonda did in that movie. We've dated the poor ones, the bald ones, the ugly ones, the boring ones, and yet...they didn't want us either.

So, I'm back to wanting it all. There seems no harm in it. Being rejected by a man who actually meets my standards seems as though it would leave a far less bitter taste in my mouth than being dumped by a troll (and I have been...many times).

This might guarantee that I remain single for life, but I want a man who is Tall, Dark, Handsome, Rich, Funny, Sensitive, Generous, Giving, Emotionally Available, Mature, AND who doesn't cheat...AND who likes smart, funny, pretty, thin, and difficult women like myself. (I'm also sensitive and kind and full of sugar and spice and everything nice too).

I just figure if the odds are stacked against me at this point, why not go for the gold?

Eighty-five percent is still a B+. And that ain't bad.

But I'm an A student.

100% baby!

That's what I expect.